Phew ! It's finally the holidays for you. Or the date is fast approaching. It's well deserved... And above all, it is very necessary ! Because holidays are a time to recharge the batteries, recharge your batteries, take a step back, open your eyes, find new inspiration and give yourself momentum. But how do you maximize the benefits of your vacation ? Come on, we offer you a little gentle self-coaching session.

FINALLY take a REAL vacation... Without feeling guilty

Ah ! Ah ! Did you think it was, right, that we were going to give you a personal development job for the period when you leave the strictly professional job? Surprise ! Your only job for the holidays is not to work. Cut ! Close your mailbox (if you only have a professional mailbox, open a personal one quickly, in order to receive everything related to your trips and other vacation bookings in a digital space other than where your work-related messages are directed);  Close the bond calendar. Don't give in to the temptation to set up a video call on the only-day-when-everyone-is-available-except-you.

You're on vacation. It literally means that you are absent with permission...

Finally, this permission is above all you who need to give it to yourself. And it's not that easy. Because between the anxiety of losing control and the guilt of abandoning the collective, not to mention this damn mental load that unconsciously sends you back to the spirit of responsibility, it sometimes seems easier to stay a little connected than to completely disconnect. But why ? BEFORE leaving, take a moment to become aware of what is at stake in you when you are reluctant to drop out.

Training exercise

For a week, write down in a small notebook all the situations in which you have carried out a work-related action outside of working hours (checking your emails, opening your computer to finish a task, making a phone call, etc.). Opposite, indicate the conditions/circumstances in which you perform this action (in transport, while looking at the television screen, in the middle of the night, when waking up before coffee).

Then, try to identify what you hoped to obtain as a benefit by performing this action : calm anxiety ? Saving time ? To beat boredom ? And finally, try to imagine what you could do other than work to meet that same need. If you feel like reconnecting with work during the holidays, have the reflex to think " what need ?" and draw ideas from your little notebook to relieve this need other than by hanging on to work.

Break habits and let yourself be surprised

What rests the body and mind is also to get out of the routine. Free yourself as much as possible from the habits that usually punctuate your days : change your schedules, get rid of the roles you take on without necessarily being asked to do so (that's right, who appointed you to be the head of stocking the pantry, organizing excursions or ensuring the quality of relations with the neighborhood ? Let us ask you explicitly ! By the way, this will encourage the fact that people think of thanking you), challenge everything you have put in place for the sake of organization and efficiency but that by dint of it, you only do it mechanically, without being aware of its meaning or usefulness.

In this way, free up space to let yourself be surprised : by new activities, by other ways of doing things, by the transformation of interactions with others that your change in posture produces. Because yes, when you lighten your mental load, you notice that those around you take more responsibility and that this changes your relationship patterns.

Training exercise

A week BEFORE you go on vacation, raise awareness and write down all your routines (from what you have for breakfast to your weekly meetings without an agenda at work, including your hygiene gestures, your travel habits and even your language tics. Imagine what you could replace all these routines with. And ask those around you about each other's habits: this will give you ideas to do things differently. You can then take advantage of the holidays to test these different things and observe what it produces in you.

Experiment with " doing nothing"

Be careful, our last piece of advice is not so easy to follow... But the benefits of idleness are extraordinary in terms of health, serenity, creativity, the quality of relationships with others, the ability to welcome one's own emotions...

But what is " doing nothing " ? It's refraining from having goals, to begin with. Get rid of any concern about utility. Detach yourself from the temptation to justify or value what you do. And then, it's also not caring about the peace of oneself. Don't ask each other, don't judge yourself, don't put pressure on yourself, don't blame yourself... And then to stroll, to abandon oneself to contemplation and reverie, to let the expressions of the surrounding world come to oneself and to listen to one's sensations.

Training exercise

On the first day, start a timer for 5 minutes and simply sit on a chair or on the floor with a paper clip in your hand. Play with the trombone. Don't aim for any goals. Chase away the thought of what you'll do next. The next day, give yourself 5 more minutes to do the same exercise. The next day, another 5 minutes, this time walking at random, without holding any object. Repeat every day for at least 15 minutes the same time of total strolling, perfectly disinterested.